Monday, September 13, 2010

The Business of Happiness

My daughter takes the bus to and from school, except when she has extracurricular activities, on which nights I pick her up. On the way, there are two school zones, not including her school's. School zone means a 40 km speed limit, which I respect, but infallibly, I'm always being followed by some annoyed idiot tailgater who can't stand it and pushes my rear end to go faster.

I ignore them.

And with good cause. Because I know that between the two school zones, there is also a fire station. And the parking lot of that fire station seems to be a favourite spot for speed traps, especially this time of year, when school starts.

So today, as usual, I was going at the speed limit and this tart was following me very closely, visibly annoyed and oblivious to the fact that the speed limit signs were flashing and, more importantly, there were countless little ones making their way home. A me, myself and I kind of ninipooh. Doesn't care about anything else around her.

And there it was. The dark police car at the fire station, with the officer clearly holding up a speed radar.

Hah. That'll teach her. I hoped that she would realize that I just saved her from getting a speeding ticket and that she would ease up being so close to my rear end.

Not so. Still self-absorbed, still oblivious. Hopelessly so. She kept tailgating me. (I was hoping the cop would come ticket her for that, but no such luck!)

Well, for all of you out there who tailgate me because I am going at the speed limit, particularly in a school zone, sorry this makes you unhappy, but guess what. I AM NOT IN THE BUSINESS OF MAKING YOU HAPPY!

And like I tell my kids when I'm teaching them how to drive, never mind the idiots behind you, just ignore them, BECAUSE YOU ARE AHEAD OF THEM AND THEREFORE YOU ARE IN THE LEAD!

Have a great day and watch for children.